In yesterday’s post I mentioned that the day was a semi-frustrating one for me. The quick back-story is that I attended an adult education/continuing education class at my alma mater, and the experience wasn’t very good. I’m going to skip over all of the negatives (there were several), but I will state that I’m not completely blameless in my perception of the experience. Very soon after the class began I realized it wasn’t going to be stellar, and my demeanor shifted from interested to hopeless, from semi-curious to closed down. So while the instructors could have done a better job, *I* also could have done more to hold my attitude in check. Had I assumed more responsibility for my own experience in the situation, the ending outcome might have been a bit less painful.
Alas, I’m human – so I will display skillful behaviors some days, and unskillful ones on other days. I’m working to increase the former (and mercifully the tide has shifted rather dramatically!); but I still have my moments – and yesterday was one where unskillful thoughts and actions came through.
One bright spot in yesterday’s experience was that a cool older lady sat next to me, and we engaged in a brief-yet-interesting conversation. Though she was at least 30 years my senior (if not more), I felt a ‘click’ with her; like she could be a lively person to have coffee with every now and again.
But by the end of the two-hour class yesterday, I was nearly overrun with annoyance and irritation; so as soon as the session ended I bolted from the classroom, made a furious dash to my car, and sped down the freeway to flee campus and return to the ‘safety’ of my own home.
It was only later last night that I fully realized I had missed an opportunity. And I was kind of saddened by that. But the only thing I could really do now was to learn from it, try to behave better going forward, then forgive myself and move on.
So I did. I reflected for an appropriate amount of time on how I could have acted better and what I might have done differently; then I committed to really trying to improve my thoughts and behaviors as future situations present themselves; and then I let yesterday go. Today is a new day.
Interestingly, this morning I returned to that same alma mater, to attend a second continuing education class. Today’s topic was completely different from yesterday’s session, and I made a very conscious effort to enter the experience with peaceful, positive thoughts.
After I checked in at the main desk, I walked to the appropriate classroom – and recognized the same cool woman from yesterday! We were both a little surprised to see one another; but we were also both pleased by the encounter, too.
I feel like today I was handed a second chance, an opportunity to correct all of my ‘failings’ from yesterday. And I reveled in the occasion.
P.S. As today’s class was about the visual arts (drawing in particular), here are some images to add a bit of visual interest to this post. 🙂